The Spicy Meatball

Help Your Friend Without Taking on Her Drama

NOTE: This post was written upon request and doesn't pertain to any one person in my life. Just thought I'd mention that to avoid getting any nastygrams/inducing paranoia. We all have the dramatic girlfriend. You know, the one who is always having a crisis, complains about everything, doesn't take no for an answer, and is generally a pain in your ass. Too bad she's one of your best girlfriends, and deep down, you love her. You want to help her, but she's exhausting. How do you help your friend without getting sucked into the drama and losing your mind? Listen Most people just want a warm body and an ear. Take the time to listen to your friend go on and on about her issue. Yes, you'll probably want to interject and tell her she's out of control, but stop yourself. Just listening might get you off the hook faster than you think. I know it's hard to hear about what he did to her and why she's still putting up with it, but sometimes it's best just to listen with a smile and not interject your opinion (which by the way, is probably right). Take an objective stance If you've listened and you're asked for your opinion, take an objective stance. It's hard not to tell your friend she's being crazy, but if you want to keep your distance then keep your distance. Offer up compromises or reasonable solutions to the problem, but try not to engage any further. Unless you're like me, and you love the juicy bits, just keep the subject matter on a surface level. Find the humor All good friends laugh with you and at you. See if you can get your friend to take a step back and find the humor in the situation. It's always there, you just have to look. Set Boundaries Let her know you're over it. You don't have to be a bitch about it, but you can get your point across that you're not interested in discussing it further if no action/resolution happens. Friendship is about honesty, so make sure you're being honest in the way that you feel without ruining your friendship altogether. Chances are the drama will solve itself with time, so just know that nothing lasts forever and the crazy will end eventually. In the meantime, remember what it's like to be on the receiving end of the drama and do your friends a favor: don't suck them in! photo credit

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